Let us forget with generosity those who cannot love us -Pablo Neruda
Love is unconditional but a relationship requires nuturing to work and flourish. Give and take, we both give and take. Many atimes expectations are not met because we require them from people who are not capable of meeting it.
You have to realise that people can only give what they have or are willing to give. For example, you might decide to borrow #300 from someone who has #50, they will be unable to give you because they don’t have or someone with #500 will give you only #50 because that is what they are willing to give.
In the same vein, someone you desire to act better towards you might not do no matter how much you talk for two reasons; It is either they don’t know how to or are unwilling to.
In this case, you have to identify which is the root. They can learn if they have no prior knowledge as childhood upbringing and environmental influences affects how much we know and how we relate with people closest to us.
If it is the issue of unwillingness, it might be time to take a step back.
You can love someone despite their shortcomings but you cannot make up for it.
That is their choice to make and you are also not obligated to wait around till they make up their mind.
The longer you stay with someone who only seeks to take from you, the more depleted your energy becomes.
Sometimes, we wish for things from someone who will never give it to us. We are stuck in this ‘if only ‘ phase. If only they can love us more, treat us better, if only they can be more sensitive to our needs, tend to us, if only they can show us more warmth. If only they can be committed to you. Maybe, just maybe, things will be better. But it is a destructive phase as you will end up miserable and sad because these expectations will never be met.
What they are giving now is what they are willing to. You cannot convince them otherwise so it is up to you to decide if you want to spend your life miserable and unhappy waiting for the change that will never come.
Only someone who loves you will make changes to keep you.
Love is selfless, seeks for the good of the other person. Any love that cannot give time, energy, money, resources, efforts, concern to you is not real and should not be taken serious.
The perpetual takers are leeches and won’t leave you until nothing is left of you.
Regardless of how much you think you love them, you must love you first with the same energy and even more.
You need to get to a level of self love in which you will realise how precious you are and how you deserve to be treated. Trash or Treasure?
Leaving a low – input, one – sided relationship is actually a big win for you.
So the ball is in your court. What do you want? How much are you willing to take before you put your foot down? It is never too late to make the decision.
Feel free to share your experiences in the comments. Waiting to hear from you.
Don’t forget to like and share with other amazing people while at it.
You are loved.💛 💜 💚