-Boundaries-

Would you allow someone to come into your home, ransack everywhere, mess up your kitchen, clothes, and just leave?

Yes? No?

But this is what happens when we don’t set boundaries. People would come into your life and walk all over you because you don’t put up any resistance. To set boundaries is a way to protect yourself and keep your respect because the more people get away with disrespecting you, the more they do it.

There is an adage that says if you give people 1mile, they would walk 10miles. If you value yourself, set boundaries. There should be a stop sign people encounter when they cross certain lines with you. It implies, retrace your steps, I am not putting up with this.

Personal boundaries define your identity. It is like a fence and doors around and in your homes. It tells people where they can go and where to stop. This is me, what I value. What I can do, what I believe, need and feel. This is not me. Good boundaries ensure we have great relationships because we know who we are, There are no blurred lines.

Jesus had values that he put a priority on — sometimes even over the needs of other people — and He did so without guilt. Mainly, His soul care had to do with separating himself from people to be alone with God, who He called “Abba” (Father). Jesus lived in a cadence of life that not only kept him free from burn out, but also kept him full of God, grace and truth, and therefore ready and able to be compassionate and generous in his response to people.

Here are examples of boundaries Jesus had

1. He didn’t let His mother and brothers use their relationship to draw him away from his ministration. Matthew 12:46-50.

2. He said no to Herod’s request, Show us a sign that you are the Son of God. He had nothing to prove. Luke 23:8-9

3. He didn’t sit at tables of people who didn’t want or trust Him. Matthew 13:58

4. He taught us to be confident with our Yes or No. Just say ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ — anything else you say comes from the Evil One.”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5:37‬ ‭GNB‬‬

And since we are to imitiate Christ, then personal boundaries are a must have. Jesus wants you to care for yourselves as He does with you. When we set boundaries, we give priority to our overall wellbeing.

So Here are a few boundary points you can use-

Don’t yell at me.

Don’t raise your hands on me.

Don’t humiliate me or talk down on me both in public or private.

Don’t use abusive words when we disagree.

“I can’t lend out my car. I am the only person paying for it.

I can’t give any more money but would be happy to help with something else.”

I am allowed to say no if I don’t feel comfortable with your request.

Yoy can choose to walk away from Certain conversations that smear dirt on your values.

You can decide how accessible you want to be for others. It is okay to offer a listening ear to people struggling, but sometimes, we become too accessible that we lose our time to develop intimacy with God.

To love others does not automatically make you a yes man or a defunct people pleaser. It is okay if you would be unable to attend the event, it is okay you are unable to help out your neighbour that one time. It is okay to say no to requests you cannot handle.

You don’t have to be in a relationship with people who try to harm you.

You can walk away from people who tear you down at every chance they’ve got.

As a Christian, guard your heart. protect your journey. Draw the lines. What you allow will continue.

Be true to your Christ given Identity. once your boundaries are clearly stated and enforced, your mind would be stable and at peace.

God loves a cheerful giver. But you cannot be cheerful if you constantly take on more than you can handle or allow people to push your buttons without resistance. Give but make sure you are pouring from a place of fullness not pain. Without boundaries, you would lose a sense of who you are.

What boundaries do you need to set today?

Stay Blessed

You are Loved💙💜💛

Angel

29 thoughts on “-Boundaries-

  1. davidsdailydose says:

    “You can walk away from people who tear you down at every chance they’ve got.”

    Great thoughts, and this one is my favorite.

    We must share God’s opinion of ourselves—that we are worthy of love and respect.

    Sometimes, I let people walk on me because I think (wrongly), “Maybe I don’t deserve to be treated better.”

    One thing I say to myself often is, “It’s ok to be a door man, but not a door mat.”

    Thank you for a great word, Angel! Blessings.

    Like

  2. CG Thelen says:

    I was part of a small group years ago that went through the book Boundaries by John Townsend and Henry Cloud. It was a real eye opener on setting boundaries and caused a lot of grief with others as I tried to enforce some of the boundaries you listed. Yet it proved to be very helpful. Thanks for this post and a reminder about protecting ourselves and maintaining who we are in Christ.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Perth Girl says:

    Such an important reminder to set boundaries because they are good for us.
    I love how you pointed out the examples from scripture of Jesus doing the same and also have very practical points of where and how to politely set those boundaries in day to day circumstances.
    Awesome Angel
    Blessings 💙

    Like

  4. theOwl30 says:

    Here is a list of Boundaries. Feel share to re-copy and/or share it.

    1. Call–before you come over un-announced.
    2. Don’t block my car in the driveway
    3. When you come in, dont walk in with a half-eaten Burger and fries and the sack they were in and continue at my place. I didn’t invite you over to dump your garbage here.
    4. When you call and I tell you to come on over, I meant just you, NOT also yer buddy from work or your dog.
    5. You came over to visit me. Therefore, leave your cell phone in your car. I dont want you to no sooner walk in and have your phone go off and listen to you yack for 20 minutes with someone at your work or while you catch up with someone you havent spoke to in 6 months while I sit there completely uninvolved.
    6. No smoking.
    7. Dont ask me to lend you money. I wont, either.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.